hahahahahahai'm making a list of things that people do on here and do them myself.
press the exclamation mark on yahoo!
dinoogle.com
jellotime.com
mysterygoogle.com
my shoes came in couple days ago! yay!
alone
PersuasionPersuasionPersuasion
You can not make some one like you, and definitely not love you, you can only persuade in the direction of the desired state of mind and if you persuade it goes against fate and if love is life and life is fate neither exist
And if neither exist what is there?
Is there fate or is there love do you need both or do they rely on each other can one exist with out sorrow or do both create sorrow?
Train 3
| I feel like writing a long explanation of myself. I was born in New York but now i live in indiana with my dad,stepmom, and sister. I don't feel i belong in indiana, but its not that i feel as though i am better than hoosiers. I dream of being a child psychologist. My career choice is ever-changing but this is what i have my heart set on. I hope to leave this state and attend a college in Texas, Colorado, or New York for my undergrad and hopefully attend Columbia University for my graduate. I love changing my hair color. right now it's my natural brown with a bleach blond stripe (it used to be pink for BCA.) Wednesday it will be a dark brown burgundy color. I am finally out of my designer clothes phase. I do not like to spend more than ten dollars on a tee shirt. this is why i love forever 21 and H&M. right now my latest obsessions are skinny jeans, v neck tees, high tops, and a simple necklace if i feel like it. my left fore arm is covered in bracelets.  Contrary to what some people (cough, cough) i do have friends. I have really amazing friends. but the people i feel closest to are my friends on youtube. (where i spend ALL of my time.)with all the friends i have made, there have been a few lost. My freshman year (and summer) i lost all three of my best friends. And for one of them i have done things that i regret. It kills me that the two at my school, we avoid each other. My parents worry about me and how i usually dont have anything to do on the weekends. But the truth is is that if I'm with friends anywhere other than school, i feel awkward. as if i'm not being myself. I'd much rather sit at home and read a good book than hang out at the mall and not feel right. (readers might be thinking-didnt she say she had amazing friens?-that is at school. at school i am 100% me.) My mother is an alcoholic (along with almost everyone else on my mother's side). I have been told on many accounts that alcoholism is hereditary. I plan on never putting a glass of alcohol to my lips. ever. (not even the wine at church). Same goes with drugs. I cant comprehend how the drug users i know use to feel better about their sorry lives. There are plenty of other ways to feel better- why not try art every once in a while? And for those who do it for fun? I don't get how hurting yourself is fun. I'm trying not to judge people by what they do. It's when they pressure me to do something is when i go preacher on their ass. That's another thing. I curse now. Not usually out of anger. but when i do, i'm most often alone. With all the bad (and good) things that i have experienced this past year, i have realized with a little help from chris, that life is too short for apathy. I should never take ANYTHING for granted. Smiling and laughing as much as possible (especially when i mean it) is something i consider to be one of the greatest abilities i have. To stop judging people will help make me a better person. Thinking of others before myself, being patient, and finding beauty in the most unexpected places will help me be a person worth being. Another thing that Chris is helping me with is expressing love. love towards friends and family, not a lover. As stated in a previous journal, I do not believe kids my age can truly love the way adults do. I am, however, happy for those who think they have found love at such a young age. Who knows how long each one of us shall live? I'm glad that if something fatal will happen in the near future you will have atleast experienced love by your definition. I live for music. Music can get me through anything and makes me believe i can do anything i set my mind through. A day without MY music, is a day in hell for me. Since this is dA, i'll talk about art. I've never been the greatest drawer or painter. I've always been interested in 3d. Through sculpture i have discovered bits and pieces of myself that i never would have if i took drawing instead. YOUTUBE! I spend ALL of my free time on youtube. I'm constantly getting messages and my subsriptions are always uploading videos. I have befriended a few "famous" youtubers (who's names i shall not say) and i could trust them with almost anything. TBC... |
Bemused
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